A Reminder to be Thankful...

The other day I came across this blog... about a family who suffered a great loss. I could barely make it through. As I began reading, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and the knot starting in my throat. This couple had lost a child, not just a child...a baby.

I remember when I found out I was miscarrying my first baby. I felt so many emotions. I wanted that baby. The thought of never getting to hold him/her, never seeing that tiny face, was more than I could bear. It was difficult to know the child that was still in my belly was no longer alive. It was hard to wake up after the D&C and know that it was over. All the plans, and dreams about bringing home a baby were gone.

God knows what we can handle. I couldn't understand at the time why I was going through this. But I know now. It was to experience God's peace. The kind of peace that Paul talks about in Philippians 4:6-7 "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which SURPASSES ALL COMPREHENSION, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." It was amazing at a time like this that I could say I had peace. But I did. That kind of peace, that goes beyond all human understanding.

When you miscarry, it means that something is wrong. There was something wrong with my baby. God knew this. And God knew that I could not handle giving birth to this child and then losing him/her. So I am thankful that He chose to take my baby to heaven early.

I am venturing off what I set out to say...but thinking about this couple that lost their child puts things into perspective. This has been a rough week. Both of my girls have had terrible head colds. They have had fevers, runny noses, coughs. They have been irritable and whiny. My patience starts to wear very thin.

And then I remember. How badly I wanted these children. How much I prayed for these tiny blessings. I do get worn out being a stay at home mom, I get frustrated. I get annoyed and would love to have just 5 minutes where someone doesn't need me for something.

But, it seems I daily get a reminder that these little lives that God has entrusted to me are fragile. They are precious. They shouldn't be taken for granted. It is a reminder to be thankful.



Caledonia Marie born December 13, 2006



Ashtyn Elizabeth born January 20, 2010